Living At Home: Creating Independence

G’day, friends, and welcome to another week and another blog post!

If you have followed me for a while or know me personally, you would know that I still live at home with my folks and younger brother… If you didn’t know… yes, I am 23 (24 in 4 months) and still live at home with my family.

In the past, I was self-conscious about this fact, especially entering the dating realm and when people would ask if I have my place or am renting, saying, ‘I live with my family’.

However, still living at home is pretty good, and I am so lucky that my family love having me at home!

Why am I living at home?

A photo looking down on my two dogs laying down on a grey rug. The one on the left is a black and white Border Collie and the Right is a mini sausage dog!
The main reason I still live at home… I mean come on how could I leave these two!

Living with a disability means that whether I like it or not, living away from home will have challenges in the independence department.

Things like putting fresh sheets on a bed, central spring cleaning (cleaning walls, cutting boards, showers etc.) and mowing lawns and gardening, are things that, try as I might, I can’t do.

The poor neighbours had a language lesson the last time I tried to put sheets on my bed.

Even though half of those issues would be solved by hiring a gardener or moving into a unit, cleaner or carer, I am stubborn. And where I am at with my disability acceptance journey, I am not comfortable getting a carer yet.

Also, another big reason for still living at home, I am unemployed, and even with government assistance, it is not enough to live while paying rent. I am also not allowed to get a home loan as the government assistance is too low, and they deem I would not make repayments. With the housing crisis at the moment, it adds even more complications.

So living with my folks is the best and safest option. And at the moment I am absolutely loving it, and am so blessed to have such loving and supporting parents and sibling

Creating Independence at home

Even though I am still living with my family, that doesn’t mean I don’t get to do my own thing and live as independently from them as possible.

We have spoken about the house dynamic multiple times and agreed that, given that my brother and I are over 18, the house is almost like a flatmate deal.

Easter 2020, thought I would do something special for my family. Four Easter Bunny Eggs are at the top of a blanket lined up next to each other with a pile of mini chocolate eggs next to them. 'Love' is spelt out with Dino Eggs
Easter 2020

We can come and go as we please, and there is no obligation to be in the common rooms with everyone.

My bedroom is like my own apartment. So to speak. No, it isn’t like a studio room, but I am setting it up as my sleeping and living/work space. So if I wanted to, I could stay in my room all day, and it would be completely fine… of course, I would have to come out to the kitchen to make and eat because lets face it, studying makes you hungry!

However, when you struggle with day-to-day tasks, creating independence at home is as simple as thinking outside the box.

I have several things I use and implement around the home that you can read all about here!

Before we changed over couches, our old couch had extra feet underneath it that we purchased from the local hardware store. It made the couch higher, which made it easier for me to get on and off.

By implementing little things around the house and sometimes adapting when needed, I am 99.99% independent at home.

What would I do if I did move out?

Say I did decide to move out of home, there would be a list of things I would have to consider.

  1. flooring
  2. stairs
  3. is the kitchen accessible? (is the oven on the ground or hip height?)
  4. bathroom accessible?
  5. distance to shops/town?
  6. grass or gardens to worry about?
  7. clothesline?

Those are the seven things off the top of my head. Unfortunately, most of these items I would have to fix. Changing the Kitchen and Bathroom would be the top priority, which is costly to change. Having vinyl planks instead of tiles would also be an essential change, as there would be the chance I would trip over grout lines.

As I said before, moving out alone would have plenty of challenges. Living with people means I am safer when it comes to falls, and money can be saved on not changing the kitchen over as someone would be there to help me.

The reason I don't want to move out of Home. A family photo of My brother, my parents and. myself at a bar.
So grateful these are my Flatmates.. see what I did there?

That isn’t to say I can’t live on my own! I have done it once before for a couple of days here!

I simply choose not to. My family is happy to help me; my mum is still happy to be my carer. However, mum and I agree that should one of us say they don’t want to do it any more (i.e. I don’t want mum as my carer anymore, or it becomes too much for her), I will look for a carer.

So that arrangement is working fine so far.

And honestly, I can’t afford to move out, thanks to all the price hikes!

What happens if I meet someone? Who knows, I will figure that out when and if that happens!

But for now, I love living with my family. Let’s face it, watching Friday night AFL games on the TV is much more enjoyable with family!

I am just simply Living Abled my way.

That’s it for another week, till then,

Keep Living Abled Your way,


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