4 Hilarious Life Lessons about being Disabled

Hello my friends! Welcome to another week!

I have decided to write a lighter post this week, as the last few have been quite serious. With the current global pandemic events continuing, we all need some laughter.   

So, in today’s blog I am hoping to depart my 4 hilarious life lessons i have discovered while being disabled, that we all need to learn in life.

I am talking about the ones that end up in hysterical laughter, with a touch of bruised ego or limb.

So, without further ado let us get stuck into this week. I highly suggest grabbing some popcorn because this should be good!

Life Lesson 1: A mobility scooter is made for one not two people!

This first amazing lesson I learnt was when I was five years old.

I had just taken ownership of my first mobility scooter. It goes without saying that I was so excited to able to drive something being so young!

You see, I figured out that It would be a blast if my younger brother was on the same seat as me!  We could drive together!!

However, what I did not anticipate was expecting him to stay still to drive.  This mixed with speed is not a good thing (I confirm that later on). I also did not realise that a scooter is made for only one person not two!

During one of our fun drives around the patio, my brother knocked my arm which made me lose control of the steering.  This sent us straight into a terracotta pot!

Safe to say:  Rhi 1 – Pot 0. I was mortified.

My brother thought it was hilarious! Mum made her way outside to begin the clean-up. I think we were fortunate that terracotta does not break into fine pieces, but instead in just massive chunks. While she was cleaning up, I was so mortified and ashamed that I sent myself to my room.

What I did not hear was the amount of laughter coming from outside. Mum came in to find me, face covered in tears due to laughing so much.  Of course I said that I was sorry and she just laughed and said ‘honey it was just a pot! It’s actually impressive that such a small scooter could cause that to break!’

Looking back on it now, it was hilarious, and we still laugh about it all the time! I am so fortunate that mum took a photo of the mess which now I can use to show you exactly what happened!

Anyone else done the same thing? Maybe drive your car into the wall of the garage? Not mentioning any names……Dad!  Or maybe you have ‘driven’ into a pole? No? Just me?? Ok… I do not believe you…….

Life Lesson 2: Never do donuts on a mobility scooter.. EVER!!

I wish I had someone tell me the do’s and don’ts of driving a mobility scooter. Especially one with three wheels! 

I was just starting primary school, and with my trusty mobility scooter I could hoon (I mean drive sensibly……… *cough cough) around the playground. I felt super important and had numerous requests for a lift to the other side of the school playground!  I really should have capitalised on that!

We lived right around the corner from school so mum would walk to pick us up and then we would ‘walk’ back home together.

I got into a bad habit of speeding home and doing donuts on our concrete driveway. What I did not anticipate though was the combination of high speed, a three-wheeler going around in tight circles and concrete.

One day as I was doing my usual activity of doing donuts, ignoring mums warnings, when my scooter started to tip to one side, and before I knew it I was face first into the concrete.

Mum came to the rescue, again might I add, to assist me out of the scooter. She had a bit of mop up duty to do that is for sure. My teeth were never quite the same. 

I had attributed those accidents with my overcrowded mouth and overbite, which resulted in braces later in life. So, if there is any lesson here it is to never do donuts on a three-wheeler…. ever!

Most people would have learnt their lesson, but nope I am clearly not ‘most people’. I did it again a few weeks later.

Life Lesson 3: never make a break early. You will probably end up falling on your face.

Another hilarious story I have for you came from my high school years.

I took part in one of our school musical productions. I was fortunate to have a small part, playing a stuck-up rich woman who ends up being eaten by the devil. Dark I know. But everyone loves playing a villain? Right?

Opening night arrived and we were anxious yet excited as you would expect. The first and second act went smoothly and my fears and anxiety about the possibility of falling on my face had been unwarranted…..Or so I thought.

As we approached the end of the performance, all the cast had to run off stage via a ramp off to the side. Due to my weak muscles, I cannot run for the life of me, it is actually a very fast penguin waddle. So I thought in order to beat the crowds and not be squished into either the wall or floor, I would beat the crowds and make a dash somewhat early.  

 So I did.

Unfortunately, I left it a little too late and was in among the stampede of 12-16 year old’s running down the ramp. All of a sudden, I felt someone ‘guide’ me out of the way.

That is when I ended up literally on my face. I think I ran into the wall, then did my own version of the Mexican Wave, and then fell on my face, skidded down the ramp (still on my face!) whilst at the same time trying to use my hand as a break.

I was fortunate enough to have a wall that blocked me from the inquisitive stairs of the audience so I was safe from embarrassment.

Thankfully we still had people on the stage finishing the musical, which fortunately distracted the crowd.  Except of course for my family…..they were very aware of what had transpired!  I am so fortunate that they didn’t do the parent thing and get up screaming, waving their arms in the air, yelling ‘Are you Okay!!!’ for all to hear!

I was half hoping when the remaining cast members ran my way that they would pick me up, but instead ran right passed me. I am grateful looking back on it, purely for the fact that no one in the crown (apart from my family!) was aware that I was sprawled out on the floor.

All in all, I ended up with a good graze on my head and badly bruised fingers that required buddy strapping for the lunch matinee the following day.

Imagine trying to do the peace sign with strapped fingers!  So during the next performance I was resigned to giving everyone the sign from Star Wars instead!  

Life Lesson 4: Never do an 8 hour shopping trip

My last lesson for you today is simply this. NEVER do an 8 hour shopping trip without the help of walking aids.

It comes as a shock for some people seeing me still walking even though I require mobility scooters and wheelchairs.

However, that did not stop me from going on a shopping trip with a good friend of mine. We started at 9AM in the morning, walking into practically every shop imaginable. I may have even impulse bought something from pretty much every shop, which did not help walking efforts. When you are already walking on your tip toes, it throws your hips out of alignment which then in turn makes you an ice-skater just without the ice. So add bags to the mix, and I had extra weight on my muscles and joints. Have I also mentioned I fatigue quickly? Yeah and there is that too.

So anyway, as me and my friend approached the last few minutes of our trip, I ran into my parents and they asked if I could take my bags for me…. I desperately wanted to be one of ‘those people’ who have bags hanging off their arms…. So I politely said no and continued on my way.

That is until I fell over right in the middle of a walkway which was conveniently placed in between a café. So I had many pairs of eyes staring at me.

They didn’t rush to help me, although fortunately my friend was right there to sit me up and my parents had a suspicion that I was struggling and followed us. So I am incredibly grateful for the parental instincts on this occasion.

Safe to say I actually learnt my lesson this time around, and I have never done an 8 hour shopping trip without my mobility scooter again.

Lessons learnt

I have many more hilarious stories, but I may save those for a second instalment!

If there is anything to learn from these mishaps, it is the need to laugh when facing such situations.

Throughout these scenarios laughter either happened during the event or sometime later!

Laughter is essential in life. It is the best medicine in making a bad day a bit brighter, or to make a great day an even better one.

I encourage you right now to go back and remember a time when things went wrong. Instead of cringing (I still do but hey it happens) find the humour in it. Trust me you will feel better.

Till next time.

Peace and Love,

Rhi.

P.S. I would love to know what you would love me to write about next! Comment below or send me a message via my social accounts!

P.P.S Share this blog with all your friends! It would be incredible to share the message of dis-ability to everyone.

Read my blog about cruising here! https://livingabled.com.au/how-cruising-is-the-best-abled-holiday-ever/